Thursday, November 1, 2012

QUERY CORNER – Successful Queries

Today I’m going to post another query that received requests. This one belongs to my lovely beta reader, Kim. This story was amazing, and her query landed her several requests. It does the job of getting attention! Check it out:

Dear Agent, (Of course, the agent’s name goes here)

The last place Evvy expected to find love is in the arms of the fairy prince...which probably means she shouldn’t have rejected his marriage proposal. (This paragraph, and last sentence, should hook the agent/editor and make them want to read more)

In fairy tradition, the worth of a fairy girl is determined by the beauty of her flower and the number of human shoes a groom is willing to pay for her hand in marriage. With a blossomless flower, Evvy can hardly be considered worth a shoelace, let alone the shoe it came from. So when Evvy is kidnapped by the Weeds but isn’t ransomed, she is certain she will never find a respectable husband,
and the only thing she wants in life, is to be worth a pair of Converse High Tops. 

As a prisoner of the Weeds, Evvy begins to feel acceptance, and a possible romantic attraction to her abductor—a man who treats her decently enough despite the occasional threat to feed her to his falcon.  But when the fairy prince to shows up a season later to rescue her and declare her his intended bride, she doubts her place in either world.   

On the journey to find her own salvation, Evvy must figure out which world she fits in before her chance to reconcile with either man passes and true love is lost to her forever. (These paragraphs should read like the back cover a book—it should sound enticing and interesting without giving too much away)

TITLE is a …(This paragraph includes the title, word count, genre, and lists any submission guidelines that were followed)

Thank you for your time and consideration. (It is always a good idea to thank them for their time and close the letter professionally)


Kim (Following your name would be any contact information—address, phone number, email address, and website, social media links)

Feel free to comment on her query or offer up any tips you have that get queries noticed!

Kimmy :)

TRIANGLES, Kimberly Ann Miller, Spencer Hill Press, June 2013

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